Beer fraud - letter to ACCC

[Dragon]

I may be chased out of these forums after this post, but I've never tried a Stella. Will go and grab myself a 6 pack, but will be sure to check its not BUL.

[Geoff]

Nothing to be ashamed of, Dragon, nothing at all.

[WSC]

I had a bottle of imported stella last night and it was much better than the last BUL I had. Thank god you can get the real mcoy again.

[Geoff]

I drank some real Beck's the other day. Ditto.

[lob]

Might also be an idea to start up a 'group' [for people to join] on Facebook and MySpace. I don't, myself, belong to these social networking sites (because I'm too introverted and can't be bothered with all that wanky "look at me, and what I did today, aren't I so great" social [-climbing] crap. However, my wife is on facebook [so I hope she never reads this.]

Also, I wonder if instead of beer it was expensive French Champagne being brewed in Sydney, if politicians who love their long lunches and important dinner parties would be up in arms.

And why hasn't tabloid fodder like ACA or Today Tonight done an article about this yet? Maybe someone should contact them?

[drsmurto]

Might also be an idea to start up a 'group' [for people to join] on Facebook and MySpace. I don't, myself, belong to these social networking sites (because I'm too introverted and can't be bothered with all that wanky "look at me, and what I did today, aren't I so great" social [-climbing] crap. However, my wife is on facebook [so I hope she never reads this.]

I'm on facebook and use it to communicate with mates on the other side of the planet. Is that wanky? There are pages for brewing companies to communicate with people, home brew shops and the like. Its only as wanky as you want to make it. You should join in with your fellow brewers so we can reduce the overall % of wankers on FB etc.

Also, I wonder if instead of beer it was expensive French Champagne being brewed in Sydney, if politicians who love their long lunches and important dinner parties would be up in arms.

Sorry to rain on your parade Lob but champagne can only legally be called champagne if its made in the champagne region of France. Anything else is called sparkling wine even if it uses méthode Champenoise.

And why hasn't tabloid fodder like ACA or Today Tonight done an article about this yet? Maybe someone should contact them?

Unfortunately Lob its only the people like yourself and the rest of your fellow forum members that care about where beer is made and what it tastes like. The great unwashed (and the people who tabloids market for) don't.

[lob]

*Hate* facebook. Yes I like the idea of MySpace if you're a music band, a brewery, *something, but the idea of everyone on this planet having, effectively, their own website to promote themselves and their Oh-so-wonderful life I find "weird", not to mention "fake". It's also an incredible time-waster. Especially that stupid Farmtown Facebook application my wife plays EVERY day. I WILL NEVER BELONG TO FACEBOOK OR MYSPACE. EVER! Then again, could explain why I have no friends...

Champagne. Ok, um "Sparkling French Wine brewed under license by Arse-wipe Wineries Hunter valley NSW" then. [BUL by Arse...NSW" in 4pt print on small back-label naturally.] How do you think the average politician would feel paying $100 for a bottle of Hunter Valley over-oaked wine masquerading as expensive French Champagne...er Sparkling. And how long do you think it would take them to make changes to the relevant liquor laws.

Can't remember the last point you made.

[lob]

And, it's got nothing to do with the fact that the vast majority of the [stupid] public drink Fake Stella and couldn't give a toss, even if you told them. They probably like it because it tastes like NEW but makes them look more sophisicated to the Sheila sitting at the bar [a part-time prostitute looking to have another baby for the baby bonus and additional welfare payments. - Not that you'd know from her Facebook profile.] There really should be no difference between beer, wine, oil paintings, etc etc. The public should know what they are handing over their cash for. To have a product like Stella "dressed up" to look like an import, with BUL in very small print is FRAUD. Imagine your wife bought a pair of "genuine [some wanky Italian fashion label] Italian Shoes." Paid $300. Got home and then noticed in 6pt type on the base of the shoe box: "Made Under Licence by Arse-wipe Shoe Rip Off Merchants Pty Ltd, 20 The Suckers Road, Bankstown NSW 666." It's FRAUD. It'd fraud if it's expensive shoes, oil paintings [see the articles about fake art on 4 Corners recently?], and IT'S f---ing FRAUD IF ITS BEER. The fact that 90% or more of the drinking-public wouldn't care even if you told them (because they're unsophisiticated morons) is irrelevant.

<burp>

[drsmurto]

I don't have a wife so whatever point you were trying to make with that rant missed by a mile.

The fact i choose to read an item BEFORE buying it must make me unique. I don't arrive home to find my beer was made somewhere other than where i ASSUMED it was made.

I do agree when buying a beer in a restaurant that markets the beer as imported but sells BUL is wrong.

[lob]

The fact i choose to read an item BEFORE buying it must make me unique.

Yip. You're that (less than) 10% of the buying public with a brain inside your head. Luckily the breweries know that 90% of their customers can't read, especially small print buried on some back label, and are happy to write you off as a lost cause. They can then happily concentrate all their marketing muscle on that other 90%; That large flock of sheep who routinely visit the clubs, shop at Harvey Norman (on 3 years nothing to pay interest free terms), send their kiddies to a $3000.00 a term private school (something with Grammar in it's title, and perhaps some religious affliation), and buy 3 of everything (because it's cheaper) at Woolies and Coles service stations as they pay $150 to put fuel into their SUV. Yeah, and even though they may not go to church very often, despite recent discoveries such as the earth not being flat or at the center of the Universe, they still sorta believe in the Bearded man in the Sky.

All the Governments (State and Federal) have to do is tighten up (i) labelling laws: point-size [20?], contrast [Black on white], Placement [Top of Front label], and (ii) Require Locally brewed beers to listed as "Local" on Menus. Easily done, the only problem being that the politicians don't give a toss...

[warra48]

...the only problem being that the politicians don't give a toss...

And why don't they give a toss?
Because they are beholden to the megaswill brewers because of the tax they generate and the political donations they provide.
The pollies will pay lip service to the reduction of alcohol induced problems, dishonest marketing, and plain lies etc, but when it comes to the crunch, the pollies addiction to the dollars will win everytime.
Same with tobacco. They pay lip service by banning advertising, but do precious little else.

[drsmurto]

Either you are venting for some other reason or you have been bottling this up for some time.

Whatever the reason, that's some quality ranting Lob.

[chris_styles]

It's hard not to get frustrated at this. Especially when in Dan Murhphy's and thinking I'll get a Japense beer like I had when I was over there, and I like a lager.
Kirin - Brewed by CUB
Saporo - Brewed in Canada (So it's still "imported")
But the best is Asahi. They usually have both brewed in the UK and Brewed in Thailand.
Surely it's more costly to brew and ship from Canada or UK. And whoever in Dan's must know where their brews come from but still put a nice little "Japanese" sign and flag under it.

And for Becks too. Those bastards.
All the more reason my fridge has Coopers and Squires in it now.

[Pale_Ale]

Lob, that is some absolutely top ranting. I thought I was a cynic but wow. You're right about a lot of it too. Consumerism has reached an unhealthy point and I like to think of home brewing as reducing our consumption of mass-marketed products.

BUL is an issue because the implication is that with identical labelling comes the presumption that beer will taste the same no matter where it's brewed. Beer isn't just a recipe. It's the quality of the ingredients. It's the quality and type of water, it's the strain and health of the yeast, and dozens of other factors that you simply can't control in an 'under license' situation. So it's only logical and fair that the labelling is significantly different - after all it's a different product.

Another issue is that despite the fact that it is brewed here it still ends up being very expensive. Why? Surely labour costs of brewing in Germany + shipping should mean a large variance in the overseas and BUL versions, but there's really not.

[lob]

I think the flood-gates opened with BUL a few years back when these unscrupulous asswipes (Management, senior accountants - f'wits with nothing to do with the brewing process) realised they didn't have to actually go to the expense of replicating these foreign beers. All they had to do was take a fairly flavourless beer such as Tooheys New and use it as the "base" and then add a bit of hops (oil) to create Stella, or Becks, or Kingfisher, etc.

You can see how these w@nkers (or marketing geniuses) now have the Australian beer market carved up if you go to a large woolies pub. The Winston at Winston Hills (Sydney) for example has all the "workers" - plumbers, electricians etc, calling in after work and drinking New, Carlton, VB. They get the beer cheapish (around $4) if they become a "member" of the pub. [Once a member the pub will bombard them with junk mail/emails regarding various wanky events.] Clever marketing strategies tell these "workers" that the people who pay more and drink "upmarket" beers are dickheads or poofters.

Meanwhile, in the evenings, especially on Fridays through the weekend they use these re-packaged Tooheys New brands to attract the younger crowd and the white collar workers. The younger crowd in particular were moving away from beer (particularly to coke based mixers) a few years ago, but "re-packaged Tooheys New as famous foreign beer brands" is starting to bring them back. Plus attracting more female beer drinkers. The higher $ doesn't hurt either.

I don't think calling these beers BUL is correct. It sort of implies that what has been brewed somehow follows the original brew instructions to the letter. Anyone who has functioning taste buds and has sampled a bottle of BUL Stella knows this is BUL shit. The correct term should be: "Re-packaged Tooheys New/Carlton as famous foreign beer brands."

btw I was in "No Choice" the other week, and looked at a slab of Stella. The only reference to being brewed in Australia was not on the Top, or either of the 4 Sides. Na, it was in very small print on the Bottom. Guess there wasn't enough room on the Top or the Sides of the case, what with the fancy Stella logo and all the European references. Glad I didn't pay $60.00 for 24 stubbies of Tooheys New.

[Geoff]

Lob, I agree with Pale_Ale: you are a first class ranter. Keep up the good work!

[wrighty]

I think i can feel another poem coming.

[lob]

Octoberfest in Sydney's West
(true story...mostly)

the foreign bar girl looks so real
in her trad-German costume
but she's really from Pennant Hills
Octoberfest, what a joke
a flat keg of Kolsch the only thing real in this facade of fakes
twelve dollars a pint that's value alright
some trad-German sausages from Coles
order at the bar and scoff 'em down
drunk truck driver adding to his gut
a beatles cover band playing next sat nite
a tranny is seated at the bar
jesus f---ing christ!
(at the hills song church no doubt)
fake plastic trees playing on one of many plasmas
the irony completely lost
all the punters are about
after all it is friday nite
some drinking cheap local, carlton, VB or new
some drinking expensive local, Stella, Heinekin, or Becks
every now and then lines form at the loos
seen enough now
time to go home, lie down awhile
this beer you buy is a f---ing lie

[drsmurto]

*stands and applauds*

[Geoff]

Outstanding work. Quite the bard.