Beer Poetry

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Re: Beer Poetry

Postby lob » Saturday Apr 07, 2018 10:26 pm

No more beer

no more beer
it takes too long to get drunk
no more beer
craft beer = expensive, rubbish, cocktails
no more beer
the taps have been replaced but expensive, wanky, fine-print-labelled, bottled
and/or
expensive cans are all the rage
wake up, hung-over
wander into Newtown, trying to find breakfast
everything is twenty-two dollar quinoa-smashed-avo-paleo-hand-me-your-wallet-you-fucking-moron fool food
no more beer...
Broome Pale Ale. WA's Finest Craft Beer.
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Re: Beer Poetry

Postby lob » Friday Apr 20, 2018 8:14 pm

Better to Down the Vodka (silly song lyrics)

you can die from drinking too much water
better to down the vodka

you can get beat up on the playground
better to break into your parents' liquor cabinet
down the vodka

you can spend all day at the pub
slowly getting pissed on 5-percent beer
listening to r-wing f-wits
better to sit at home sulking
downing vodka

just ask a Russian
(a steroetypical one)
I'll translate what they say:
'better to down some vodka'

you could be an astronaut
just floating around, drinking shit from a tube
better to down the vodka
float around in your head instead

open the freezer door
sit on the vinyl-tiled floor
it's like being in Russia
sterile, hard, f---ing cold
down the vodka
Broome Pale Ale. WA's Finest Craft Beer.
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Location: Canberra

Re: Beer Poetry

Postby lob » Monday May 21, 2018 3:00 pm

Drinking 24/7

drinking 24/7
paving the way for bouncers to earn their keep
drinking 24/7
road carnage just the beginning
drinking 24/7
vomit, toilet, pale-faced in the bathroom mirror
drinking 24/7
coffee and greasy breakfast, useless
drinking 24/7
“good on ya Hawke”
drinking 24/7
sobriety overrated but probably would live a longer and more purposeful life
drinking 24/7
can’t figure it out, why she left
Broome Pale Ale. WA's Finest Craft Beer.
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Location: Canberra

Re: Beer Poetry

Postby warra48 » Tuesday May 29, 2018 5:37 pm

Golf

I was told by a reliable source
On a nearby golf course
Hit it straight and long
And you won't go wrong
You'll be a winner
That means a grinner
Score every hole for par
And you'll be a star
And when the clubhouse gets near
You can smell that beer
After the last putt you sink
You will have earned that drink

Amen
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Re: Beer Poetry

Postby lob » Friday Aug 03, 2018 6:27 pm

Beer Drinker, 2049

beer drinker, 2049
android bartender
order the low-gravity mars-grown ferrel hops malt-ale
36.95 Meso a glass
wrist-pay, smash it down
order another, look around
70s disco-era-chick-themed android barmaid scans me, finds i’m unhappy
clicks into cheer-the-customer-up mode
entice more orders, more money, more-for-the-sake-of-more
always more
money, now 0’s and 1’s
0110110101101111011011100110010101111001
look out the window
sickening red haze, runaway climate change
the science was wrong, no magic bullet to fix
on that account, those evil-fuckers, the now-dead - lucky them
Koch brothers, were right
sigh
drink some more
barmaid knows how to entice
fake smile, fake, everything
return to The Cubicle to sleep off the grog
at least I survived
the trump era and early 20s nuclear war
Broome Pale Ale. WA's Finest Craft Beer.
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