A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest members. So when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This is natural selection and is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group is continually improved by the regular culling of the weakest members.
In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells, now as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, the regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, therefore making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. Hence the reason we always feel smarter after a few beers
cheers
Porridge
Slà inte maith, h-uile latha, na chi 'snach fhaic!
dags64 wrote:Cliff said it in an episode of Cheers
You beat me to it!
"Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer." - Dave Barry.
SAM: What's new, Normie?
NORM: Terrorists, Sam. They've taken over my stomach and they're demanding beer.
SAM: What'd you like, Normie?
NORM: A reason to live. Give me another beer.
SAM: What'll you have Normie?
NORM: Well, I'm in a gambling mood, Sammy. I'll take a glass of whatever comes out of that tap.
SAM: Looks like beer, Norm.
NORM: Call me Mister Lucky.
WOODY: What's the story, Mr. Peterson?
NORM: The Bobbsey twins go to the brewery. Let's cut to the happy ending.
WOODY: How's it going, Mr. Peterson?
NORM: Poor.
WOODY: I'm sorry to hear that.
NORM: No, I mean pour.
WOODY: Pour you a beer, Mr. Peterson?
NORM: All right, but stop me at one. Make that one-thirty.
WOODY: What's going on, Mr. Peterson?
NORM: The question is what's going in Mr. Peterson? A beer please, Woody.
WOODY: How would a beer feel, Mr. Peterson?
NORM: Pretty nervous if I was in the room.
WOODY: Hey, Mr. Peterson, what's up?
NORM: The warranty on my liver.
SAM: What do you say, Norm?
NORM: Any cheap, tawdry thing that'll get me a beer.
SAM: What do you know there, Norm?
NORM: How to sit. How to drink. Want to quiz me?
COACH: Can I draw you a beer, Norm?
NORM: No, I know what they look like. Just pour me one.
CLIFF: Hey, Norm, What's up?
NORM: My blood-alcohol level.
"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink I feel shame Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
~ Jack Handy
"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. "
~Frank Sinatra
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!"
~ Brian O'Rourke
Yeah I can see your point, but the Scots don't mind a pint or two either and look at all the clever folk that have come from there. this years Australian of the year for a kick off
Cheers
Porridge
Slà inte maith, h-uile latha, na chi 'snach fhaic!
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